Comments on: Pay the money or take him to court?

By: international student loan program

international student loan program — Sat, 22 May 2010 06:49:56 +0000

Excellent Editorial! Have you had any luck in applying for international student loans in the US? Any advice you can give me?

Thanks,
~Conrad Hanko~

By: Clark K

Clark K — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 05:17:47 +0000

I am so sorry that you had to learn your lesson with such a huge loan. I personally lost around $2500 on my ex girlfriend, and that is how I learned to keep my wallet and checkbook locked up and not spend or help people out like I used to. Unfortunately you are stuck. If you feel you need to help people out by getting them a loan, make sure they sign the papers too as a cosigner or borrower, they will be more likely to help pay it back.

By: Gatsby216

Gatsby216 — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 18:26:13 +0000

See an attorney right away. They may or may not be able to help you. Could you get him to sign and IOU, at least you have something. It may be a collections question.

Its funny how you say he was going through a “bad divorce”, no sh….t. That is usually the type of divorces that con-men go through. I am sure it was worse for his ex-wife.

Now this next statement is very important. It is something you will have to re-read and something you should not forget.
When you encounter an act of bad faith, do not ever expect the person commiting the bad act to change behavior or care about resolving the problem.

I can see you mind working, with the church comment. You have not fully understood the workings of a sociopathic con-man. Of course they go to church, that is where you find sympathetic suckers. I would certainly write a letter to the minister of the church explaining what happened to you. AND DO NOT call him or alert him to this.
You need to make a clear and direct statement that he needs to make a major direct payment on the account.
Good luck.

By: slabberdasken

slabberdasken — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 01:36:00 +0000

You handed him $15,000 in cash? Wow! Do the only thing you can do. Fight fire with fire. You need concrete proof when you go to court. Get him to admit that he borrowed the money from you on tape or in writing. Get a trusted friend to set a trap for him if you have to. This is war, and all is fair in love and war.

I wish you the best.

By: Jim M

Jim M — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 01:05:30 +0000

Let me first say that there is no way that you should have to pay that.

Now, let me say, unfortunately, your going to.

You did the bad thing by taking a student loan and giving the dividends to someone else.

The only way you will ever recuperate your loss, is if he fully admits his wrong-doing and agrees to pay it back.

It sucks, but its the law. The good news is, you learned a lot from this relationship.

By: Rosanna

Rosanna — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 05:06:58 +0000

Look on the web for the legal sites that offer one free consultation and ask an attorney.
I did something like that with my ex, “gave” him credit cards for “business” expenses and he was using them to buy perfume and lingerie for some other woman. I told the credit card company my card was stolen and someone was charging up a storm on it. THEN I called an attorney and filed for divorce, and had my marriage annulled, (I could as we were living at either end of the US for school purposes.) After that I felt better.
Now that I have learned the hard way, I can honestly say, if you have to give them money, drop them and RUN in the opposite direction, no matter what they say!

By: SG Elite

SG Elite — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 21:49:55 +0000

You have definitely been conned. Without any written proof you’re doomed. Since the Student loan was taken in your name, you’ll be liable to repay. This will also affect your credit score. An expensive lesson to learn but what’s been done cannot be undone. Be smarter the next time. This guy has abused you because you’re too naive to have fallen for his tricks.

By: Gem

Gem — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 03:55:42 +0000

Wow tough lesson for you my dear.

$15,000 knocks the debt out of small claims court, and misuse of a student loan may be another issue, go see a lawyer (most give free consultations) to see if anything can be done.

But I doubt it. He will say it was a gift, you will say a loan and the court will say why the heck do we care. Your only chance will be if he either admits it, or has made some payments to you (which would prove he knew it was a loan).

But in answer to your “next 25 years of my life” question, no you should not take 25 years to pay this loan back. You are young and have made a mistake, fix it. Go take another job (or 2 or 3) and send every dime you make to get this loan paid off as soon as you can. You will save thousands in interest and won’t have this hanging over your head.

Good luck, and remember next time, separated is NOT divorced and if he is dating you while still married, he will date the next one while still married to you.

By: Nanneke

Nanneke — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 21:32:20 +0000

I would talk to a lawyer. There is no way you should have to pay that and he gets away paying nothing. Have you talked to him? I don’t think I would be too kind about it.
Best of luck with this situation.

By: kendell c

kendell c — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 10:19:02 +0000

You cannot sue him. You have no proof and you never married. You have been had. All you can do is pay the loan. Chalk this one up to a lesson learned. An expensive lesson. Get on with your life, eventually you will have it paid off. Never, ever give a guy money again.

By: - Kay -

- Kay - — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 15:19:29 +0000

The money is yours, I suggest you should take him to court.

By: Carachapina

Carachapina — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 01:34:42 +0000

Since you probably don’t have enough money to see a regular lawyer, find the nearest Legal Aid office and get their opinion or contact the state bar where you live. SUE this parasite and expose him for what he did to you.You have the receipts right? Go after him and don’t let anyone change your mind.

By: bernel1403

bernel1403 — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 15:12:59 +0000

Sorry, but cash has no bearing in court. You’d have to get him to admit you gave it to him and furthermore, that it was a loan. You could get the 900 back probably.